Private

Dear Friends and Family, I've decided to make Sadie's blog private to only emails/people I allow to see it.  Please let me know by email, if you would like for me to allow you to have access to her blog.
Thanks for you understanding,
LisaLane757@gmail.com

Sadie's cast

Last week Sadie started limping with very little signs of injury. She had a small swelling on the top of her right foot, but nothing that looked bad. B decided we should go ahead and take her to the Ortho.  They X-rayed her foot, but didn't find any breaks. The doctor decided that it might be a sprain and went ahead and cast her foot. Frankly, I'm surprised she didn't hurt herself fighting to get free from me and the doctor holding her down while he wrapped her foot. I don't blame her a bit, but she does not like to be held down.  
Anyway, keeping the cast on for 2 weeks isn't that bad, I'm just really glad it isn't summer. We've had to keep her out of the wet yard and sandbox, which she absolutely loves to be outside.

 

Sick

I'm not sure what's worse... knowing your child is getting sick by the first signs and symptoms or fearing how bad it will be.  Either way, watching, anticipating, wondering how she feels, it's a sickening feeling seeing her stop eating and sleeping 3 hours in the afternoon when she never takes a nap.  Or hearing the first sounds of a gag, that you know are about to turn into throw up and wonder how close I am to a bucket, the sink, or hard floor that will be easy to clean up.  Because I've cleaned up throw up more times than I can count and don't event find myself repulsed by it anymore.  Or worse feeling relief that your other child who is now 5 years old, can at least sit and take in the experience with some understanding, and even lends a helping hand by brushing her sister's hair out of her face.

Hoping for a restful night tonight and that this little bug gets out of our house quickly.

Willowbrook Institution Follow up by Geraldo from his 1972 visit

In 1972, Geraldo Rivera did an expose on Willowbrook Institution in NY.  If you have never heard of Willowbrook, if you have never thought what an institution looked back in the 1970's, if you have ever wondered about institutionalization in the 60's and 70's, watch this follow up story about Willowbrook.  You will forever remember this place.
(click on the title and it will take you to the video)

potty and more potty

Potty training is seriously driving me crazy.....Yesterday she pooped in her underwear 3 times and peed all over herself twice.  Keeping on top of putting her on the potty regularly is exhausting, sometimes she goes and other times she won't.  I'm having a really hard time figuring out how to get her to have a BM in the potty too.  She will grunt  and grunt and I will repeatedly run her to the potty, but always she goes the second her underwear are pulled up and the 2 seconds that I'm not stalking her.  The person getting potty trained here is "me."  I can't give up yet though. I really do think that once we get her BMing on the potty that it will be easier.  Any suggestions to get her to release.....

blowing raspberries....not funny to the speech therapist

"Sadie is a wreck today, " was the first thing the pregnant twenty-something-first- time-mom speech therapist said the moment she saw me in the lobby of Sadie's school an hour ago.  She continued to describe how Sadie was blowing raspberries or zerberts and she continued to tell her "no" and sign "stop" during her short 20 minutes of speech therapy.  Her therapy session is at the end of Sadie's half day preschool. She continued to describe how Sadie thought it was funny and continued even though she said "no" and signed "stop."  She was genuinely frustrated that Sadie continued to do this. And truthfully, Sadie looked like she had been crying, which is VERY rare. 

Okay so Really?????  Sadie IS intellectually disabled, she has the intellect of a two year....what the @#$% do you think two year olds do.....they blow raspberries and zerberts and they think it's funny.  Honestly in the scheme of life is blowing raspberries and zerberts REALLY that bad.  Sadie is essentially non-verbal, so how else you you expect her to communicate?  The fact that the speech therapist found it necessary to complain over something so small the moment she saw me is concerning.  Hell, she's lucky Sadie didn't poop in her underwear or pee all over herself.  Hell, how about starting the conversations with a positive comment first and then pick your battles.  Really? Blowing raspberries is the definition of Sadie being a wreck today in a 20 minute speech session???

GRRRRRRR...........

 

Blogger Hibernation

I think I'm ready to come out of blogger hibernation.  I started this blog knowing that my audience was "me."  I thought a few people here and there might read it, but really it was for me to express my feelings and in many ways, this blog became my friend.  The friend I could tell anything to, share anything with, without judgement.  Ironically, I have been saying for the past few months that I have been hesitating to write because I was nervous about Sadie's article and I knew the blog would be mentioned, I didn't know who would be reading it after it was in the paper.  


But I just realized that might have had nothing at all to do with my lack of posting.  I just now in the last 3 minutes and the previous paragraph realized that I haven't been sharing because I didn't need to.  


In the past 3 months I bonded with two of the most amazing women. They see me truer than anyone ever has..they both have children with special needs and they know exactly what life is like.  The unspoken connection that the three of us share has brought a sense of peace to the craziness called my life.  I have spent the past 5 years isolated from nearly everyone and I just now realized how much happiness they have brought to my life.I realized just how lonely I have been.  We have been sharing everything with each other and it feels good to have such wonderful friends.


We meet for coffee, or share a meal, we cry through movies, and we even give support with hugs and crying together.  We know each other, we KNOW.  With a look, a phone call, or a text, I know I've got friends for life.  


And so I'm ready to come out of blogger hibernation because I have a lot to share now, wonderful things have been happening and I feel like I'm living again.  And so the sequence of events that keep leading me to something new all started right here with this blog, this friend that I counted on and I could tell anything to, all thanks to Sadie giving me a new perspective on life and taking nothing for granted.  


I'm looking forward to sharing more....for starters....Have you seen the movie Extraordinary Measures with Brendan Frasier and Harrison Ford?  The movie was inspired by the true story about the Crowley Family in the novel The Cure by Geeta Anand.  John Crowley also wrote a memoir, Chasing Miracles.  Anyway, our local children's hospital is hosting its annual bioethics conference and John Crowley is the key note speaker for the day.  Anyway, as one thing has lead to another, as it always will, I was asked to sit on the parent panel at the conference.  Anyone that knows me knows that I'm pretty shy, so the thought of sitting on a stage in front of 200 heath professionals scares the @#$% out of me.  Thankfully, I have several more weeks to calm my nerves and read The Cure.  Chasing Miracles was powerful and hit home.
Looking forward to more blogging....